When will the tunnel end?

In his book, Life without Father, David Popenoe, wrote: “Growing up without a father may be a root cause of many social ills—from crime to academic failure.”  How true! 

When I think of my father, words like “strong, handsome, religious, available, patient, protective, wise, respected, tender-hearted, safe, responsible, and loving” come to mind. And then when I imagine my life without my father each of these little elements disappears, we speak of living in the 21st century, but the advantages we would take of women without a man to support her is unreal. It is said that from birth, children who have an involved father are more likely to be emotionally secure, be confident to explore their surroundings, and, as they grow older, have better social connections, if only the world actually understood this.

No I am not using the absence of a light house to be the reason for my blindness , but yes the lack of light definitely can most certainly be the reason for anyone to go astray.... true? I kept my eyes wide open , I kept my senses alert , I made every conscious effort to keep my dignity intact , but yet I managed to stumble onto so many pit holes filled with muck .....Pit holes I would've avoided if there was light in my life.

I got stuck in quick sand , fell on my face , hurt my ego , my self-esteem just because I was blinded .... Blinded and determined to reach the end of the tunnel and see light.... even if I saw a ray of light I would start walking again only to fall on my face again and again and again. Every onlooker misjudging my motives , every person judging my morals but none made an effort to understand that I was not making the wrong choices or I was not morally weak or neither was I lost, I was just looking for my light house ..... I was just looking for my father..... Some never understood and the others? The others took advantage..... Life was never normal, as an 11 year old I remember my childhood being burnt in front of my own eyes, but who understood me? Only the person who was being burnt.

 A little girl needs to see herself reflected in the love she sees for herself in her father's eyes.  This is how she develops self-confidence and self-esteem, a healthy familiarity with what a positive expression of love feels like, and an appreciation for her own looks and her own body. 

Likewise, having a father present is how she develops immeasurable skills that will help her stand up, face the world. This might not be true for all..... But for someone like me who still looks for her father in every atom of the world, I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father's protection.